That’s what friends are for!
By Yemisi Sawyer
*Singing* “Keep smiling, keep shining, know that you can always count on me… For sure… that’s what friends are for….Through good times, and bad times, I’ll be on yr siiiiiide forever moooorrreee….That’s what friends are forrrr…..”
I always hated that song.
I thought it was cheesy. And irritating. And Dionne Warwick’s nasal twang made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, and gave me gooseflesh. And not in a good way…
But I’ve been thinking a lot about friends. I’ve met some spontaneously, had some thrust upon me, stumbled upon some accidentally and made some consciously. I have a good number of them, and the truth is they are all kind of awesome.
Its so great that you can choose your friends, and that you can de/dis/un-friend them when you are no longer on the same page, when your interests or values or ethics become divergent, or they show themselves to be untrustworthy custodians of your secrets or dreams. (Now, If only one could do that with family members then life would be pretty much near perfect!!)
In the last two years, I have been through some harrowing stuff. And I have to say this… I discovered that I chose wisely. And the ones I did not choose, God chose for me… Planted them so firmly in my life that they have grown roots… so you guys know now, you are not going anywhere…
I have homies who are ready to break bottles and fight for me – some liiterally, lol, and some figuratively, and friends who spend so much time in prayer for me that they have dents in their knees and sore throats from crying out to God on my behalf…
Friends who are clearly psychic, or possess some kind of extra sensory perception because they always seem to call me up just when there is a crisis, and those who listen to me on the phone for hours and hours when I need to vent (Trust me, this is no mean feat…I really do go on a bit!!)
I have friends who will bring out the box of tissues when it all gets too much and sit with me, silently passing me one after another as I sit blubbering incoherently; and friends that will wire me cash they don’t really have to help me out of a fix…
My non-blood brothers and sisters who just sense when I need a hug, and give them freely; who I confide in when I fall, or fail to live up to my own and Gods very high standards –which by the way I often do- and they may berate me, but they never judge me, and they listen when I have things to say.
Kindred spirits, who are not afraid to tell me the truth even if it is painful to hear; who will force much needed advice down my throat like bitter medicine when I act like I don’t need it; and kick me up the bum every once in a while with a steel toed boot, to shake me out of melancholy, or complacency, or anger, or bitterness….
My ride or die peeps who will tell me when something, or someone, is beneath me or not deserving of me; in whose houses I have parking spaces and a designated room, and a free 24 hour pass to the fridge and the stove…
Friends whose children call me Aunty Yemisi, and whose pictures I carry in my wallet; and friends in whose family albums I feature heavily… Who are quick to forgive my numerous offences, and who are quick to not be offended when I forget to stay in touch…
My people, who I may not always see, and maybe who I havent seen or spoken to for months or years, but feel the same love whenever we do talk or get together…
And, thanks to the advent of the Social Network, friends I havent physically met. But who enrich my life in unimaginable ways through their words…
I thank you and I cherish you.
.
You are a valuable and irreplaceable piece of my big picture.
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